A face without freckles is like a night without stars...

Starr is me, I am her, and she is I. She is so much more than she thinks she is. If you asked her, she would say she is just a mom, wife, daughter, sister, and friend. However, she has been told many times, that she is more than that. Her loving Heavenly Father reminds her all the time, that she has gifts and talents to share with the world, and that like unto her name, she should let them so shine before others, that they may light the day, like the stars light the night. She is passionate, loyal, and gentle all at the same time.

Often when people see her they don't see a gentle, quiet and fragile woman; however, they are wrong. Deep down inside that's who she is, and only those who are truly looking, will see who she really is. If you happen to make it through her exosphere, consider yourself to be a blessed individual. Not many make it there, but when they do, they have a permanent place. Her caring ways, allow her to see things in the world a bit differently than others, unique to a fault.

She truly sees through a darkened glass, and can see beyond the darkness, and find hope throughout the world. Beyond her large, thick exterior are gems within her that are priceless, that are only valued on a spiritual level. Buried within the layers of her atmosphere are different pieces of her puzzle, and even she has yet to put all of the pieces into place. May you enjoy each piece she writes; they truly are the picture into her puzzle.

My Children

I am the mama of two all encompassing children, who own every ounce of my heart and soul, even the part their dad holds onto gets kicked out at times when one of the two does something magical to melt my heart. LillyRose is our precious big girl now, who is a whopping 6 years old! From the moment she wakes in the morning until her head hits the pillow at night in one way or another she reminds us that she holds a status the rest of us don't: Miss Diva Wildfire. Her independent nature, and natural ability to question the world around her has given her the actual gift of life, as every family member knew when she was born at 2lbs 6oz, a fighter since the day she was born.

Our son Abraham Jr. is our love bug. He has eyes that melt every inch of any woman's soul, Look out Ladies! At 5 years old, he is such a smarty pants and I LOVE it! His father recently said he had a genius on his hands, I didn't dispute him or his shining pride I felt emanating from his smile. My son is like the coals beneath a beautiful fire, and often times these parts of his personality help me through my days and "ignite my own fires within myself." Like his sister he too came into this world a fighter at 3lbs 6oz, and his tantrums prove to us that life wouldn't be as interesting without him.

My Children "run" the show, even though we would never admit that to them! That would result in utter defeat in our battle of parenthood. Our days revolve around their schedules, routines, likes, dislikes and even the amount of dishes in the sink when mommy has friends over! My oh my! ;) Together they make up the valves within our hearts, and are the blood circulating through our veins. We are extremely blessed to be their parents and though parenthood has tested us in ways we never imagined, I know we'd be lost without it.

Monday, March 20, 2017

Be Unapologetically You

When I was younger, I used to be more authentic to myself more than ever. As I grew older, it was as if this time bomb went off inside of me that said I needed to care what those around me thought or felt about what I was doing. Maybe it was always there and I just didn't fall prey to it's presence in my mind as much when I was younger.  My consciousness has grown on so many levels, I am more aware of my thoughts and feelings more so than I have ever been in my entire life. On one level, I wish I was still unaware, because it felt so much easier being unaware of my own body, mind and spirit. It was easier to be in the dark about feeling anything, really; then it wasn't as painful, because I could just pretend that it wasn't there. I realize the lie that's in those words though, because the pain never really went away, it just transferred to another part of myself, the part that I kept locked away from everyone.

The trials that I faced in my life have shaped me into the woman that I am today, and I wouldn't trade my trials for an easier life, I would change how I responded to them though. My entire life I have worried too much about what other people are thinking about who I am. I was in a place of insecurity, and didn't realize that I didn't need to compare myself to anyone else because in all reality, God designed me to be who I am, or was in a particular moment, and created me to be just who I am. Learning who I am has been a process though, it comes with long nights of writing, listening and experiences in every day life.

The internal programming that was instilled in me at a young age, has been something that I have tried to reprogram since I was about 19 years old. At a young age, I knew that I came from a different breed of individuals. I decided that I was going to keep the good things instilled in me and adjust the rest, because I knew deep inside the type of person that I wanted to be, and I always knew that my life was meant for higher living. I don't mean being financially rich, earthly successful or anything like that; I meant that on a spiritual level I was designed by a Heavenly Being, who had a purpose and a plan for my life.

Living in my own purpose, gives permission for other's to live in their own purpose. I'm realizing that I don't need to apologize for being who I was created to be, or who I am becoming. I realize that if other's don't accept me for who I'm becoming, we're just not on the same level. There is nothing wrong with being on a different level than another, when we judge the level other's are on, we are not able to focus on the level were on. We live in our purpose when we are doing what makes us feel the best about ourselves as well as others.

The more I ask myself the questions about life that perplex me, the more I don't know about myself. Each layer that I discover about myself helps understand my purpose in life, and the better I understand my purpose in life, the happier I become, and the happier I become, the better able I am to be unapologetically me. I hope you understand your purpose, and what you were called in this life to do. I know it takes time to figure out. It takes time to understand that purpose is how we live a happier life.

I hope you are living in light and love, and if no one has told you today: You are love, and I love you.


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